Almondsey


The Happydog Inn, Town of Parson

Well, abominable and squalid as this town is, it has the largest inn in Estalia. Happydog provides excellent basic food, drink, and accommodation; fine bucolic entertainment such as cockfights, boxing matches, mud-wrestling, dominoes, and darts; some games for the old men, a playground for infants, and a garden for the ladies. (You can do some others things here, too, but we don't publicize that -- just ask the room steward...) Read about Parson here.


Apart from great drinking and good country food (but no whores to share rooms with there), The Happy Dog Inn in the town of Parson, County Felsoran, Province of West Estalia, has a lot of 'lower-class' entertainment, especially in the Arena in the cellar. There is even a small playground for children, while mothers tipple, and a horseshoe pitch and a bocchi court for old men, and a garden with stone chess tables, exotic wildflowers, and carved elves and such. Two terraces along the North Branch of the Par RIver for outdoor enjoyment, a private dining room, and a large public dining room. A huge taprooom (or 'public bar') with an attached 'snuggery' for people who want to smoke themselves to death, or plot assassinations.

The most interesting feature, however, is the small hedge maze. It wouldn't fool a rat for long, but has the added attraction of encouraging explorers to collect nine marbles -- red, blue, and yellow -- from various dead ends. If you retrieve them all, and throw them into the central pool, you will have nine lucky days ahead of you. You might be claustrophobic or otherwise upset by mazes, so the chicken way out is to go right from the entrance, then left at the point you can do nothing else because of the kitchen wall, then do a little left-right-right jig and follow the kitchen wall to the exit (you will at least have collected a red marble, one hopes).

The basement contains storage cellars, but the main interest is the mud-wrestling room, the game room -- darts, pool, and bar billiards -- and the famous Arena where boxing matches, cockfights, and the like are held. These are all badly lit and ventilated rooms, illuminated by oil lamps. That doesn't bother the patrons. There is also another bar.

The upper floors (first and second only are shown here; there is also a garret floor): Serving staff of the The Happy Dog are accommodated in the north part of the building, with a servants' hall, a men's dormitory, and girls in the garret. Water for the building is supplied from the well in the northwest corner which can be accessed from every floor. There are two public rooms on the first floor -- another large taproom, also used for receptions and theatrical presentations, another 'snuggery', and a third dining room. The 'wedding suite' is on this floor; there is another similar suite above it (expensive rooms but with private service). Note the wooden galleries on two side of the building; these are used as access corridors and ambulatory drinking areas. The second floor contains nine guest bedrooms, the three on the east being 'communal'. Seven more are on the garret floor. Over the servery is a skylight and an air well. The southeast corner is a triangular tower, the upper floors of which, and the south wing, are inhabited by the publican and his family.


Estalia